The oil of man is communication. Without effective communication there is no life. There is no such thing as no-communication, because that already says something. We communicate with everything we have, not only with words, but also with our intonation, posture, facial expression, hand gestures, clothing and much more. The goal of effective communication is mutual understanding. Time and again this turns out to be very complex and therefore extremely interesting. Those who can communicate well in any situation have an edge and will achieve their goals more easily than others who communicate less effectively. You could say that the art of effective communication gives you a distinctive advantage in a competitive job market. Your added value for an organization increases exponentially with effective communication.
What makes effective communication so difficult?
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Of course it has to do with the complexity of humans themselves. Just remember that each person has their own frame of reference. Computers that communicate have almost the same protocol, but the human computer (read the brain) is programmed differently for everyone. A message that is clearly spoken can therefore be understood differently by everyone. This is just step one in the complexity of effective communication. How about human emotions? When they come into play, things get even more complex. When you feel attacked, insulted or wrongly accused, the blood can start to boil. The oxygen is literally taken from your brain and your muscles are fed with adrenaline. Your reptile brain takes over the communication. Instinctively you shoot in flight or fight mode, that’s nature.
Can effective communication be learned
Yes, of course! That’s the beauty of man. We can learn. Of course, some are naturally better at communicating effectively than others, but everyone can improve themselves. We distinguish 2 levels: the basic skills for easy coordination and the skills for conversations where a lot is at stake and emotions run high. The two-day training Crucial conversations will teach you a model with 9 powerful skills for effective communication.
Basic level of communication skills
To take the first steps towards effective communication, there are many good training courses to follow. You will learn the basic skills, such as listening, asking open questions, summarizing, giving feedback, using positive language, visualizing, tuning in to different types of behavior and much more. This helps enormously, but in practice it appears that communication can escalate considerably at decisive moments, even though both people have the aforementioned skills. How come?
Crucial Conversations, skills for conversations that really matter
Your communication skills are really put to the test when the stakes are high, opinions differ and emotions run strong. When these 3 elements all play a role, we call this a “Crucial Conversation”. So not all conversations are crucial conversations . In fact; only a small part can be characterized as crucial. These are the conversations that determine the future. Often these conversations determine whether a project will succeed, whether we can work together, whether we will achieve the intended results and whether the relationship will remain good.
Yet we see that when the tension mounts, the emotions start playing a role, we usually don’t show our best side. We shoot in flight or fight behavior, which is a normal human reaction, by the way. During these kinds of conversations, it appears that people find it difficult to maintain a dialogue, to really listen and to work on the common principles, common goals. While these are often very important moments, ‘crucial’ moments.
Fight and flight behavior
If one does not feel safe because of the tension, one tends to follow the natural impulse. Two basic behaviors can then be seen and heard in every conversation and/or meeting. On the one hand, people tend to keep insights to themselves during crucial conversations. People decide not to say things: ‘It makes no sense anyway’, ‘They are not listening anyway’ and more such thoughts and/or statements. We call this form of behavior ‘flight behaviour’. For example, people share the concern and or annoyance with the coffee machine, or at home, but the real problem is not yet solved. The other form of behavior is the opposite, which is ‘fighting behaviour’. During fighting behavior one does express what one thinks, but in such a way that this leads to discussions, or the other shuts down, it can be taken personally. Under the guise: ‘I’m just being honest, I say what I think’, the fighting behavior is often excused.
“If you don’t speak it out, you will act it out.”
Joseph Grenny, Co-author and speaker Crucial Conversations
Joseph Grenny – Mastering the Art of Crucial Conversations (30:50)
OUR UNIQUE QUALITIES
Create lasting impact with our award-winning training solutions from the worlds most influential leadership training institutes.
Our leadership development solutions are based on decades of scientific research to provide effective skills and insights.
The focus of our training programs lies on the effective learning and implementation of new skills in the organization.
With an extensive network of professionals we can provide the same quality of training worldwide, in many languages.
Our mission is to develop talents of people to empower them and your organization. We do this by being a partner in stead of just a training provider.
We are convinced that the skills and insights of our training solutions will impact the lifes of participants forever.
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Joe Kerrigan Team Lead Operations at EAIEVitalTalent
Effective communications means staying in dialogue
If critical conversations are poorly handled or ignored, the result is that the person, the employee, the team or the external relationship itself and therefore the organization remains below the level of the desired results. Strong relationships and better results are created when people learn to recognize this behavior and convert it into dialogue. During the training Crucial Conversations on the one hand, the participants learn a model with 9 new skills and at the same time, the skills of effective communication are applied to their own examples.
“Crucial Conversations is Life Science”
Stacey Nelson, Senior Master Trainer Crucial Learning and speaker
Are you curious about the possibilities? Download the brochure Crucial Conversations , or send us a message. We look forward to a closer acquaintance.DOWNLOAD BROCHURE LET’S TALK